Category Archives: My Dead Grandmother Is Cooler Than Yours

An Old Grocery List

My parents are continuing to purge and pack their house as they prepare for The Big Move.  As this process continues, they keep discovering the things that they kept from when we were little pups. If you can name it, they have probably unearthed it.  Like this treasure of a grocery list written by yours truly.

Grocery List

Stocking the pantry was a passion, even then.  In all seriousness, whenever Grandma Boots came to take care of us, grocery shopping was always an activity because I personally found it to be The Most Fun Ever.  Mom would come home from her job, and she would find another bag of groceries we didn’t actually need.

I’m not entirely sure what the Sissymilk was – I think that may have meant Lactaid Milk because when I was younger I had an uncomfortable lactose intolerance that has since diminished.  This may have something to do with the fact that I don’t drink full glasses of milk any longer.  I like to see that I balanced this need with the need for a brick of sharp cheddar cheese – always a good choice.  I am also reliably informed that we were NOT allowed to have Gushers (but apparently we were allowed to have Snickers bars?) and that is how and why they made their way onto the list.  Grandmothers are clearly the best enablers.

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She strikes again.

Sometimes, you have a plan for the day.  Because you’re a Planner and that’s what Planners do.

And sometimes, you end up at the mall for three hours, which gives you a compelling case for power-napping after the fact.

Both are totally valid, but who wants to guess which one happened to me today? 😉

So where am I going with all of this?  Mom read my post about the ugly coffee mugs.  And then she called me to tell me that the next time I came home, there would be a surprise waiting for me.

We are a family full of recreational thrift-ers and so I just had VISIONS of all of the possible ugly mug motifs she could have happened upon.

But it was not to be.  While she was rifling around in the basement for this, that or the other thing, she struck gold.

Yes, just as with the 1960’s Chanel Perfume and the replica of Princess Di’s Engagement Ring, my dead grandmother continues to be cooler than yours.

Behold.

A brand-new Queen Elizabeth II Silver Jubilee Coffee Mug.

We’re talking “new” to the point where I had to peel the $0.59 price tag off of it.

Yes, I’m sure that means that I should have tried to hawk it on eBay or something like that.  But really, that mug and I?  Were totally meant to be together.

I just love it when the stars align, no?

What’s the strangest thing you’ve ever received from a relative?

A Flock

Yesterday I cheated y’all because I told you all about my flock-to-be and then didn’t give you anything to go  off of.

Behold.

In the mix: Kaleidoscope, Lady Gaga, Engagement Ring, Mime and Traditional turkeys.

Fantastic, no?

Speaking of engagement rings…

Behold.

Naturally, I’m sure you’re wondering, Kat, how did you mobilize so quickly to get a faux-Kate Middleton engagement ring? Isn’t that a little bit overboard?

The answer is yes, that sort of thing would be totally overboard, even for me.  And really, I’m not into the idea of purchasing a replica of someone else’s engagement ring.

But lest you think that Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde have overtaken me, you have to realize that as per My dead grandmother is cooler than yours., it’s a replica of Diana’s engagement ring.

Tricky.

And more authentic, really.

So, after 30 years, all I needed to do was to direct Mom as to its locale in the house, and voila.  On my finger.

I’m off to enjoy my Friend-Thanksgiving dinner!  Happy Saturday, lovelies!

My dead grandmother is cooler than yours.

It’s so bizarre to think that this fall, it’s been eight years since Grandma Boots died and four years since Grandma Juaine died.
But today, I stopped by home to get a pair of yoga pants mended quickly and Mom produced the coolest thing.

Grandma Boots’ bottle of Chanel No. 5.

Mom is allergic (in a migraine inducing way) to most of the fragarances in the world and so she gave it to me.

Which kind of makes it a weird-belated birthday present that I absolutely adore. I was google-ing some old Chanel ads to see when this bottle would have appeared and it looks like this bottle was manufactured in the mid 60’s.

Like really, just wow.