Stuff Other People Wish They Would Have Known

At some point in the last year, Madelyn informed me that motherhood changes you because you are now connected to all mothers.  You are all sharing in the same struggle.  I didn’t truly understand what she was saying at the time but of course, now I do.

I was honestly so blown away by what everyone else wished they had known when I wrote my first post about the stuff I wished I had known.  Because I wished I had known that stuff too.  Sisters, you are not alone.  Keep carrying each other.  And enjoy some more wisdom from our tribe.

  • People always frame the period of time after you had a baby to getting “back to normal”, whether it be life or your routine or your body shape, etc. Well, I don’t want life to be “back to normal” and that’s not even something that’s attainable. I have a tiny person that was added to my family and I am creating a new “normal”. I put a lot of stress on myself to get back to normal, and I wish I would have been able to re-frame that for myself sooner. (Madelyn)
  • You won’t break your baby! They are resilient! (Madelyn)
  • Sleep brings more sleep, but it’s also not the hill to die on. They’ll damn well sleep when they want and stay awake when they want. (Madelyn)
  • Babies cry. And sometimes you can’t fix it. This is not a reflection of your worth and skill as a mother. (Nina)
  • A single smile at the end of a long, fussy day will make you immeasurably grateful. (Nina)
  • That my new mom group would be my lifesaver and help me realize that what I was going through was normal. (Christine)
  • How to limit visitors during those first few weeks in order to get the sleep I needed. (Christine)
  • How important the “get out of the house once a day” rule would be for my mental health. (Christine)
  • You might not have an immediate connection with your baby and that’s okay… You will eventually. (Christine)
  • While I was pining for him to gain more independence from me, that I would mourn the days of him being so dependent. (Kirsten)
  • How much my identity would change. (Claire)
  • I hadn’t internalized that I would always be “on,” even when I’m off. I mean, I am a mom 100% of the time. Not 95% less a Friday night I want to go out. The consistency of the responsibly hit hard. (Kari)
  • When fighting diaper rash, use a blow dryer to make sure the bum is dry! (Barb)
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