Hello from the Polar Vortex.
When I was 17, my boyfriend and I went to the movies for a date afternoon (I mean, let’s be serious…this is how the kids roll) and our choices were Mean Girls and The Day After Tomorrow. I let him choose because he was home from college for a long weekend and he went with (not shockingly), The Apocalyptic One.
It was a terrible movie and for years I rued the fact that I missed Mean Girls on The Big Screen.
But end of the world-style movies are of more use in these times than the On Wednesdays We Wear Pink-message.
The past few days have been probably The Worst Weather that you can possibly experience in Minnesota, rivaled only by That One Time When MNDoT Failed And The Freeways Were A Solid Sheet Of Ice For An Entire Week OR When We Experience Pavement Failure.
This weather, with the biting -40º windchill, is what drives me to keep an extra pair of pants, two pairs of UGGs, a spare fleece and a jacket in my car at all times.
Why two pairs of UGGs?
Because if I keep both pairs of UGGs in my car, it leaves me with more space in my closet. One pair is all I need to fend off the cold. It’s not as if you can layer boots after all.
Our news stations have turned into some sort of JV Weather Channel. My Facebook feed is cluttered with people who are either (1) Screenshotting the weather screen on their phone or are (2) telling-off the people who are posting screenshots of the weather from their phones.
Everyone has been cautioned that if they spend any duration of time outdoors that is longer than the walk between their house/office and their car, they will turn into a White Walker.
Which is basically true.
Mostly, Marcus and I have been giving our biggest parkas some much-needed attention. Staying inside. Drinking wine. We just barely cleared zero on the thermometer this afternoon in Minneapolis and it looks like we’ll do as well for ourselves tomorrow. It’s basically a heatwave on the 45th parallel. By the end of the week when we hit thirty, I’ll probably have to dig my bikini out.
Stay warm, friends!