What is a Monday: Yapping up my side salad from Toby Keith’s at 3 AM. I don’t love that bar, and I really don’t love places where people don’t wash their hands or their produce.
What is a Monday: Getting the cramp from hell in my right leg. I now completely understand why I need a Tiger Tail or a Foam Roller. Thank God Jenna was able to provide some emergency perspective as to whether or not I should use a softball or a rolling-pin as a substitute. The rolling-pin won.
Some Tums and Ibuprofen would probably remedy the situation, but right now I’m trying out champagne instead. It’s because I’m a problem-solving kind of girl.
But no one wants to hear about nasty things like feeling crappy, so let’s get this show on the road!
That’s right, it’s Wedding.Dress.Time.
In case you haven’t figured it out already, I’m ruthlessly efficient as a bride.
Set a task in my path, and I will make sure that it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.
Please note I didn’t say that “I complete the task,” because in all cases, most of the leg-work gets outsourced to Linds or the Mommas.
Case in-point: I pretended that I wanted to call and make my dress shopping appointments until Linds asked me flat-out if I wanted her to make the appointments.
So she made the two that I requested, even though as I shared with you all on Friday, I was never, ever, in a million years planning on making it to the second one.
The Dress was the second one that I tried on. But since this is a “Once in a Lifetime” experience, you had better believe we spent two hours at David’s Bridal trying on every dress we could get our hands on. I know that a few of the pictures are blurry, but I figure you need to see them all in order to feel the full-effect of my dress trying-on-extravaganza.
Yes, I know that you can see the awful bustier-thing sticking out the back of half of the dresses I try on. The moment I took that gnarly thang off, everything zipped up.
Who was useless: The assistant that was assigned to us. To put it bluntly, she was a curl-brusher. She looked slovenly and unkempt. I wouldn’t trust her to dress anyone else, since she obviously couldn’t dress herself. I know that sounds kind of catty, but I was honestly astonished by this. If I thought she was having a bad day, it wouldn’t have been as big of a deal, but she was honestly putting her best foot forward for us.
What was wonderful: My bod. Honestly, after all of the weight I’ve heaved off in the past year, I looked (and felt) SO fantastic trying on ALL of the wedding dresses. They fit-well and since I am all truth and no lies, it was a HUGE self-esteem booster. Yes, I’m more vain and narcissistic than the average person. But I would say I really did look great in most all of the dresses. They just weren’t The Dress.
Yes, I found The Dress and because it’s sale-time at David’s Bridal, we took it home, in pristine condition on Saturday. It fits like a glove, but is made to be taken-in two sizes or let-out one. So next March, we’ll take care of that.